With the opening Friday Night of the 2014 high school football season on the horizon, every barbershop in every small-town in America is probably buzzing with the conversation of who are greatest high school football players of all time. It's a valid question considering the pool of talent that passes through most small towns. People often wonder where these guys end up long after their playing days are over. I've often asked the same question about many of my ex-teammates. Two in particular, Darius Brewnington and Kenny Shaw.
If you were an athlete in the early 1990's they were arguably considered two of the most influential athletes in North Carolina's rich high school football history. Unfortunately, like many other high profile athletes life happens. However, even with the growing pains of life every man has his day of redemption. With Darius and Kenny being former teammates of mine I wanted to see for myself who they are 20 years removed from fame. So this past week I sat down with the two of them to discuss their journey. I wanted the message to be shared from their mouths to my ears with no filter.
Needless to say their transparency was eye opening. They both echoed that their perception of the game was just that, a game, and their perception of life was real. They both lived in fatherless single parent homes and longed for the structure that most boys need from positive male figures. I asked them about the impact of not having a father in the home and their responses were. (Darius and Kenny), "If we had fathers we would have had the discipline/influence of a man at home. We wouldn't have had the option to do some of the things outside of practice and school that we did wrong. We needed guidance, we needed structure."
My follow up question was, is not having a father the motivation for you both being involved fathers? Kenny, "It definitely is. It's the reason why I do what I can do, because I know what's it's like to not have a dad in the picture. I know the impact". It wasn't hard to figure out that Darius and Kenny both had regrets about some of their youthful choices of being fatherless sons. Yet their transparency never wavered in our conversation. In that transparency Darius shared with me his greatest self-inflicted shot and his greatest accomplishment.
He (Darius) was brutally honest about his time incarceration. He shared nuggets of how strong the pull of breaking the chains on doing the right things post release were. He also shared the relief of making new and refreshing life decisions. He ranks his new lease on life at the top of his greatest accomplishments. Much like his playing days he's not allowing youthful choices to define who he is as he moves forward in life.
From there we visited who they are now, and how they embrace what many perceived them to be 20 years ago. That part of the conversation moved us to the topic of leadership. I asked Kenny how did you get to be a leader? He humbly said, "I've learned that leaders are born this way. You don't chose it, it choses you. You can do the right thing with it or the wrong thing with it. With my gift of leadership I've decided to give back to the kids in the community. I'm the head coach of a little league team now, and I understand the power of choice on a different scale". Darius said, "It's (leadership) not a choice it's a part of who we are. If telling my story saves one kid then I've done my just due with the kids in my community. I know who I am now, and I know that my life has meaning and purpose, and I can't waist it. I have to help save the young men in my community from some of the things that I did".
In my closing question to Kenny, I asked him how did he handle so much success at such an early age? His response was, "I never looked at myself as a star and I still don't. My only goal was to play hard. I never came to Andrews looking to break records. I just wanted to win and help my team. D (Darius) and I never talked about football on the outside of school, but when it was time to play we were ready". Darius's response added additional clarity. "That's what we were suppose to do, breaking records and being the best was the standard at Andrews. We fell in line with everyone else because that's what was expected of us".
As a former teammate of both men, it's hard to imagine this story having a tragic ending. I mean how can it? To sit down with Darius and Kenny for over an hour chopping it up about old times, one can't help but celebrate their willingness to not quit. Most importantly it gives everyone a chance to digest the why. Why were two of the greatest high school sports stars ever even in the conversation of the players that you never knew? It's simple, without them there wouldn't be anyone to help save our young men and boys from what others don't understand.
So now when you hear the question of what happened to Darius Brewington and Kenny Shaw, simply answer, they're growing up just like the rest of the players that you never knew... The Red Raider legacy never dies because it knows no defeat. It only knows the jubilation of redemption and victory. Future Hall of Famers...
To be continued...
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| Left: Kenny Shaw Right: Darius Brewington Photo by: J.J. McQueen |
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